#71 What is Spiritual Sovereignty? (And How to reclaim It in a Toxic World) | Celestevolve Podcast

taniastanly (00:02.305)
Yeah, it's recording. I think this is OK. And I think you're on the side. You've got to come a little bit more in the center. Yeah. Yeah, now that's right. Yeah. Or when I do the thing, you're still on the side. So you're just like, you have to come a little bit more. OK. No, the camera should be OK. The camera, the previous one was OK. Like, OK.

Susan Gold (00:28.972)
I'm trying to avoid my beige wall, although.

taniastanly (00:32.563)
Really, which is the beige wall? The whole thing? Let me see. you're trying to avoid the beige wall. And you want to show this one instead. The background.

Susan Gold (00:36.066)
This, this, the beige wall.

Susan Gold (00:45.974)
It's okay. It's okay. This is good. See?

taniastanly (00:47.078)
okay, then I'll tell you what. You want to avoid the beige one. Okay, fine, so you can move here and then turn the camera here. Yeah, and like you wanna, mm, yeah. Yeah, no, it's fine, I don't have a problem. It's just that when I'm doing the reels, right, I notice that when I don't tell my guest to be in the middle and I tell them to make the reel, then the guest would be on the one side. So it just doesn't come up, right.

Susan Gold (01:00.182)
It's okay, it's okay.

taniastanly (01:15.32)
But the beige wall is nice, right? Is it not?

Susan Gold (01:17.952)
It's yeah, people that can read our, our, our us can see like, I'm telling the truth. They can see that this is the real person coming at you.

taniastanly (01:22.637)
Yeah?

taniastanly (01:28.276)
the... like does the beige wall have anything to do with aura reading? Really?

Susan Gold (01:36.526)
If you have, yeah, like your background is slate gray and it's dense. So it's hard for people to see your, that people that are visual that can really see things. And I'm sorry, I know this is not too hooey for you. I know you understand, but they can't, they can't, they can't reach your aura. It's harder for them to read it with the charcoal background, but with like white or beige, they can read it.

taniastanly (01:41.74)
Yeah. Yeah.

taniastanly (01:46.957)
Right.

Yeah, yeah.

taniastanly (01:54.562)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fine. See, mmm.

taniastanly (02:05.983)
I like the white and beige, you I like the background. It looks more nice, but then most of my recordings are happening in the nighttime. So I have to go dark or I will blend with the background. So. thank you. Thank you so much. You are too. I know you were doing media, et cetera, right? And then you switch to the whole thing. We will just get going. Okay. We'll just start talking about it.

Susan Gold (02:06.241)
you

Susan Gold (02:20.236)
You're beautiful, you're so beautiful, you're stunning.

Susan Gold (02:33.144)
Yeah, sure.

taniastanly (02:39.831)
Hello everyone, today we have Susan Gold, no, no, once again. Hello everyone, I'm incredibly excited to have Susan Gold on the Celestiball podcast. Welcome, Susan, how are you doing today?

Susan Gold (02:52.654)
I'm doing really well and excited to be with you.

taniastanly (02:55.831)
Susan, you talk about gently awakening people to the toxic systems in their life. Can you tell us what led to your awakening to the toxic systems in your life?

Susan Gold (03:07.224)
think I came in awake and then I was in a very chaotic family, as many of us are. And I went back to sleep. I had all these abilities. I was telepathic. I was a highly empathic being. So I could read the texture, the tone, the mood of the room. And I could also read people's thoughts. And it got to the point where I chose to shut that all.

down and it was helped and aided by the systems I was living in, the chaotic family system, the ancestral history and lineage that I came in to heal and the schooling rather than education. So it wasn't safe to have these extra abilities. I had to closet that. My school friends didn't like that kind of thing. And also I grew up in a religious system.

Um, that was very against that. It, it really affirmed the mystical, but it really repressed your own power and connecting from within. So I kind of shut down really early when I heard I needed a broker to speak to God essentially in that system. And I was like, that is not true at all. I don't believe that at all. Like as a little one, I was very in tune. Um,

So what happened was in my teenage years, I was shut down tight. And if you see photos of my teenage years and early twenties, I'm very dark. There's darkness around me because I'm so shut down to the light. And my family has a history of addiction and I followed that line perfectly. And I think I was 25 when I got sober and I started to awaken again to my

here on earth and to the reality of the structure that we're living in.

taniastanly (05:15.699)
You can hear the alarm.

Susan Gold (05:17.463)
Yeah, that's fine.

taniastanly (05:21.073)
It's fine. I would rather do the podcast than do the drill. Let's just stop.

So how did it feel when you realized that you were in a toxic system and then you had to come out of it? How did that moment feel like in your body?

Susan Gold (05:41.934)
Well, first of all, I think I was four when I realized I have memories going back 18 months. I have very specific memories of childhood. But when I was four, I knew I was in a dangerous place, that my family home was not safe and I was not safe. And I was terrified in my body. didn't trust my surroundings.

And I didn't quite know how to find soothing and safety that was consistent because that didn't exist in that home. So I knew early on I had to stay in tune with what was happening around me. And I did keep myself safe by intuiting the danger because one of my roles in that family was to play broker between my parents at a very young age.

and break up their fights. I was being raised by two addicts and I didn't really understand that until I was much older. But my mother was very kind and loving and very talented, but her moods could switch on a dime. You could literally, could see her eyes would shift and it was almost like she was leaving her body and she would brutally beat me for what I didn't understand.

taniastanly (07:07.7)
you

Susan Gold (07:08.17)
And my father was a man child and he was drinking from, you know, morning till night. And he was a genius astrophysicist. And he would come home, lift me up and throw me up and say, who's my tiger? And I would rub against his whiskers, but I could smell this scent. And I didn't really understand that was whiskey.

taniastanly (07:22.8)
Wow.

Susan Gold (07:37.76)
So I didn't really understand what the difference was between somebody that was intoxicated and somebody that was sober. And so I was living amongst this sort of false kind of reality and unsafe platform and terrified. And my nervous system was on overdrive very early on and my authentic power was stripped from me.

taniastanly (07:46.387)
Hmm.

Susan Gold (08:07.374)
So I was living from the outside in trying to combat what was coming at me, trying to be perfect to negotiate through that and trying to anticipate others' needs. So I turned into a bit of a chameleon until much later on when I could really wake up.

taniastanly (08:32.1)
You said you could read people's thoughts. And then in the beginning of the podcast, we were just having an off-camera conversation about auras as well. Were you able to see auras? Do you remember anything that happened as a child that make you believe that you were and you had all of these gifts?

Susan Gold (08:50.082)
Yeah, seeing is not my strong point. My strong point is more clear sentient, like just having a feeling and getting a knowing before it happens. I can also tap in and get information, but I didn't understand what I was doing. You I had many precognitive happenings. My grandmother was not in a good place.

And in the middle of the night, I awoke and it was my because I awoke from a dream. My grandmother was visiting me. We were at her funeral, but she was still alive and she was talking with me at her funeral. And then the phone rang and I woke up and it was the call to say my grandmother had passed. So I was very in tune and I had a lot of visitations. had a lot of dreams where I was stuck. You know, those dreams where you're stuck and you can't speak.

and you're trying to escape. I had a lot of that in my childhood. And I had a lot of just inner knowing that things wouldn't be okay and that I was needed there. So my energy was utilized in that home to try to keep peace and keep calm. There was literally one day I walked home from school and there were my father's clothes were being thrown out the second story window into the front yard. It was my mother.

taniastanly (09:48.071)
Yeah.

Susan Gold (10:16.792)
trying to kick my father out of the house. And I immediately ran and started to pick up the clothes and take them back into the house to try to make peace. But it was only later that, and much later, that I understood what these gifts really were. And the telepathy came again, very strong. My son, he was four, and he told me one day, Mommy,

I can read your thoughts just like you can read mine. And I thought, where'd this come from? But it was true. It was very true. as I've gotten on more deeply into my spiritual class, and it's been decades, and my heart opening, that's when I've come to realize what strength and inner power and inner gifts I have and to actually trust them and come from that.

And I think that's been dumbed down by the systems that are now unraveling. I hope that makes sense.

taniastanly (11:25.517)
It does make sense and I can't even believe what it would be like for that little child to go through the whole thing and feel like she, the whole, all these problems are either because of her or that she has to resolve it. It must have been really hard. You talk.

Susan Gold (11:42.67)
It was excruciating and I left at 17 the morning after I graduated from high school. I left and I rarely went back. But I want to say that I've done a lot of work around my family of origin and the lineage. And I actually feel now that I was placed perfectly in that home. That was a perfect role to serve my mission here on earth and to heal what I needed to heal.

So I've actually been able to make amends and feel comfortable engaging with my family of origin.

taniastanly (12:22.225)
I was listening to one of your videos where you were talking about how important it is to address the trauma that one has gone through to live a life of freedom. And while I was listening to the podcast, I was telling the story to my child, my daughter, and she asked me, why does, why do adults hurt kids or why do they do this? So I said that it's because the adults themselves were hurt as kids. And then she asked me, so who's the first man who started all of this?

And I didn't have an answer for that. And it seems like you do. So tell us, what do you think, when you did your research, left you with the answer on why the whole thing started and what were the reasons why you were placed in the family that you were in?

Susan Gold (13:07.118)
I believe I was sent here to become a student of a school that's very dense and dark and not for the faint of heart. It may be, you know, the straight up ghetto of the solar system, who knows, but it's tough. And we earn our ticket here, it's a golden ticket because we have such a chance for soul evolution.

I think if I had to do it over again, I'd certainly look at the fine print and the contract. And I know we're told we come in with free will. I'm not so certain now how much free will we really do have. But I can say that if it's true or not true, it helps me to look at this from the perspective of I'm learning from this. So I lift the boulder. I see the dirt, but I also see the glitter.

And I know you had a strong awakening after your divorce. And I too, I think that was the ultimate perfect storm for me to wake up because I was still repeating behaviors that I had used for decades to stay safe and to keep my light sort of tamped.

down, but available for others so they could feed. I don't know if that makes sense. And it was actually an experience of going through the divorce and seeing how I did that. That allowed me to evolve. My ex-husband, I call him my greatest guru, as in teacher, not in someone that I have great adoration for, but I certainly learned from him.

taniastanly (14:45.617)
Yeah.

taniastanly (14:50.181)
Yeah.

Susan Gold (14:53.598)
So I'm not sure where this all started, but I think it's very, very long, long, long, long time ago. And I think we're at a point now where that is all starting to shift and we're going to play by different rules, rules of really accepting our authentic power inside and living from that place versus living from what governments tell us what.

religious systems tell us what patriarchal medical systems tell us. I feel like the truth is coming and your daughter is very, very psychic. She's wonderful. What a bright young girl.

taniastanly (15:41.091)
I think all the children these days are very psychic and they are, they feel things they can see through when you, when you are talking BS, you can't punk them anymore. When you talk about inner child healing, which you talk about a lot, did you, were you aware of the trauma that you had gone as a child or was there a particular moment when you grew up and you did a sort of meditation, et cetera, where you became aware of the trauma that your child.

that you as a child went through.

Susan Gold (16:14.318)
So when I really realized about my own inner child, that was after I got clean and sober. And I've been clean and sober for decades, like since the 80s, because that's the bargain basement platform for me to get clarity. And I think I was probably 25 and the inner child came up. I was doing traditional talk therapy at the time. And I just, I don't have time for that.

I, that's just really ick and I don't want to go there. And it has been a process to slow down enough to go there. And I think the ultimate was that perfect storm and the divorce when I realized how much I had been foisting the same kind of behavior on myself that was initially foisted on me continually. And this is after decades of meditation, long-term retreats and

taniastanly (16:47.023)
Yeah.

Susan Gold (17:10.612)
all kinds of healing modalities and being clean and sober and working all those programs. I really didn't get it until I could finally surrender to that beauty inside my heart that had walked me through all of this. And my childhood really was train wreck. I knew it was bad when I was there. I knew I was in crazy town and needed to get out.

But I didn't understand the depth of the insanity until I was able to wake up and out of it, until I could really see the patterns that I was repeating and I could start to shift those. now my heart, see it as a piece of my higher self came with me and it's guiding me from my heart if I'll listen. How many times have you had that voice?

like arc, like don't go into that marriage. That may not be the one for you, but yeah, it'll work out. know, it'll all be okay. If I had been able to listen to her and value her instead of beat her up in every way, you know, just horrendously, I think I would have had an easier, softer progression, but it took what it took for me to learn. And now the piece, interestingly enough that I've come

to. You know, for a lot of years I would make the teacher the guru. I would make the channeler the guru. I would make the psychic the power. I would make the tarot card reader, you know, my be-all and end-all. And now what I've really opened up to is it's great. It's fun to check into that stuff. There's some amazing gifted channelers and mystics and psychics, but ultimately

It all comes back to my inner sovereignty. How do I feel about this? How may I take responsibility to move forward in my life? And that's really been my mission and my Mecca for people to find your own sovereignty. You're capable. You have the similar gifts.

Susan Gold (19:35.347)
as these people that we were handing over our power to and to really discover the truth within our own hearts.

taniastanly (19:45.355)
It sounds like you and I have had very similar stories and it sounds like a lot of the people on the planet have been going through very similar modules, course modules, right? You first come with a lot of sensitivity, then you go through a bunch of wanting. It sounds like it was like a fun journey where you forgot who you were and then you recognize who you were. Now you want to share the joy of that freedom with the world. When you said that

you had to leave behind the toxicity and the toxic systems. What were you afraid would have happened if you fully acknowledged that I was in this toxic system?

Susan Gold (20:30.988)
my world would fall apart because when you owe your allegiance to these toxic systems, whether it's a family system or what you've learned, how you've been schooled or this corporate system, right? Especially, you you're in that corporate system, you're in that cubicle, you're playing the game, you're ripping apart your associate. You're terrified you're not going to survive. And I think that's the setup, right?

So you have to have the courage or I did. I did have courage. I didn't fit in that corporate system. I dropped the game and I decided I'm going to do it on my own, even if it's the harder way. I had been working in a very glamorous talent agency and I was training clients on the side to meet my ends. And Barbara Walters, who was a very famous interviewer,

taniastanly (21:28.697)
yes.

Susan Gold (21:30.092)
I used to admire her when I grew up and I wanted to go to New York City and be just like her. Well, she became my exercise client. And one day I knocked on her door at 7 a.m. and she said, Susan, get in here. What happened?

And I didn't like to reveal things, private things about myself, but I said, you know, I'd been sexually harassed in the workplace by my boss the day before. And she said, I'm coming to work with you today and we're going to confront this man together. That's okay, Barbara. I got it. So I went back and I did confront this man and he promptly fired me. I had three months of cash in the bank. I was newly sober. I had no family support.

And I didn't know quite how I was going to make ends meet, but I knew I couldn't be an admin anymore. And Barbara ended up offering me a job for her then fiance, who was running this huge film distribution company. said, Barbara, I just can't be an admin anymore. I just can't do it. And I really honored what I needed. And I ended up matching celebrities to brands. And my first deal was to knock on the door of the factory and convince

Andy Warhol, who was a famous modern painter, to do a commercial for Tri-State Pontiac that he didn't want to do. And by following that intuitive voice and trusting things would happen for me, and I would be taken care of in the flow in lead, even though was terrifying, believe me, I spent many nights like worrying.

Things just happened and after I made that deal with Andy Warhol, just other projects started coming and that led me into producing for television and film. But if I would have stayed in that hole and stayed in a place where I didn't belong, I don't think, I just would have had a different trajectory. So there's points and there's been many points in my life. know, same when I had to.

Susan Gold (23:32.352)
I knew I had to end the marriage with my husband. I was terrified. My friends can understand. You're so capable. You know, I had bought our family home. I was the breadwinner. I was pulling more than my weight, believe me. And I thought I would crumble because the fear of abandonment was so deep. But when I could really see the value that I was giving away and the expense of that.

The metaphor for that marriage was he wouldn't leave our family home. I carried a mattress across our floor into a partial conversion in our garage. And he stayed in the master bedroom. And it was a calendar year that we stayed in that scenario until that divorce was final. And to divorce an alleged narcissist, you need to hold no contact. And that means no eye contact.

The only communication was through text and very short answers to the text or the email. And I had to hold that kind of line and carry that strength. And it felt so unjust, because here I was, like carrying the mortgage and paying the taxes and doing all the, and I was on a mattress on the floor in the garage. Like that's the billboard.

taniastanly (24:35.073)
Mm.

Susan Gold (24:53.496)
that I needed to fall on my head to say something's wrong here. I need to shift this scenario and I need to stand up to it. And once I could really clearly see that and then go in and do somatic work to shift on a cellular level, because the talk therapy was great for the storyline. But at 25 year marker off and on with all that stuff, I ended up at the same place. And once I could see that,

taniastanly (25:08.299)
Mm.

Susan Gold (25:23.094)
and really start shifting at a different level. That's when my structure changed, my neural pathways changed, and I could really come from a different place. And it's that kind of inner strength that we need to follow and not from the external. I mean, it's amazing how much you use from the outside to get you through the day and you have to come back and say, you know,

That source is not my employer. My employer is source and source is gonna take care of me. I'm gonna take the right actions and it's all gonna work out somehow and it does. But to make those shifts and then to understand these challenges that are rolling your way, they're all opportunities. It's just an opportunity. It's an opportunity to move through that and to learn and understand.

And that's where the real freedom comes in. So it's hard to awaken people because you don't want to be awake to that. But yes, I agree with you. We are coming to a place where we are being shaken. We're having to understand. Yeah, we just can't give our power away to these politicians or governments anymore. We can't give our power away to these physicians and these surgeons.

taniastanly (26:46.069)
When, after I got divorced or I was in the process of it, I also met a lot of other single mothers and people who are going, women going through the same situations. And it is hard. Everybody is scared. And you would think, I mean, as an outsider, when I'm hearing stories of these women being abused, et cetera, I would think, why is it so hard for them to recognize they're being abused? Can't they just leave? But it takes time.

It's like you've got to and then after five, six years of still being with them and seeing how the pattern is, I've come to realize that when you are, women seem to have a higher threshold for pain and we think we can still take it. We can still take it until they really treat you so bad that you then decide, okay, finally this is enough. So then unfortunately when I hear stories, I know that if they're not ready for it,

I'll have to unfortunately wait for them to go through that level where they say, is enough and there's nothing we can do from the outside till they come to that recognition. And it made me want to ask you, although you were in the garage and he was living this nice life, do you remember that moment, exact moment when you decided this is it, I'm filing for a divorce?

Susan Gold (28:08.888)
Well, was, we were trying to work out an agreement where he'd be more fiscally responsible. So we were in, they call it mediation. And we were down to the last point of negotiation. And I thought my marriage is going to be saved. Thank God. And it was all a setup.

taniastanly (28:24.906)
You

Susan Gold (28:27.338)
because he, you know, as alleged narcissists do, you know, it's a, it's all a manipulation and a dance. So we got to that last point and he folded his arms and his eyes went into those lizard like slits. And he said, I'm hiring an attorney and I'm filing for divorce. And that's when that intuitive voice came in so strongly over my right shoulder and through my heart and said, this is the universe doing for you what you cannot do for yourself. So that was a mantra.

taniastanly (28:38.378)
you

taniastanly (28:42.548)
Yeah.

Susan Gold (28:56.066)
that I held onto. And as I stayed in that garage space, I could see there was no way that I could deny the abuse of behavior. First of all, what man would do that. So every time I would think, poor me, I would say, at least you can see what you've been accepting.

You are accepting living on the floor of a garage of a home you bought and paid for and maintained. And so once that was clear and I kept having those realizations, there was no way I could turn back or pretend or that fake gauze that you wrap yourself in and just, yeah, there's no way that could come back on and I could live in denial.

taniastanly (29:45.193)
It's true. What do you think are some of the toxic systems that people often mistake for being normal?

Susan Gold (29:53.57)
Well, I think there's many of them. Let's just look at the religious structure first. What kind of rules and regulations are that really when you really look at it, and I know I'm touching on it, a very tender cord, but I feel there's a lot of control in many. In the new age system, there's a lot of control if you really look at it and to the point of abuse.

taniastanly (30:18.6)
Like what?

Susan Gold (30:21.976)
just the mandates and structures and the suggestions and you need to tow the line or you're not accepted. I would take a look at all of it and going back to that, the channeling and the tarot cards and even the astrology, what fits for you? Be careful before you buy it, hook, line and sinker. Our discernment, our knowing has been trained out of us with

purpose. We've been numbed and dumbed down for purpose. Our power, our beauty, our intelligence, our ability to create has been tampered with on every level. And awaken and just question. There's never been a more apt time to question every bit.

of what you've believed up to this point.

taniastanly (31:24.648)
Mm.

Susan Gold (31:26.486)
and it's insidious.

taniastanly (31:29.542)
Yeah, in fact, when I started the podcast too, it was because I wanted to get the answers to everything.

So every time a channeler comes on, I'll have questions, more questions, questions, questions, questions. And then it's like never ending. And I wanted to channel too, them. Do it so that I don't have to, you know, ask the channelers. I wanted to get it. And then once it's a, what I would look, do is that try to raise vibration, frequency, eat vegan, cut out toxic people, like these kinds of things, right? Like you keep going up and up and up and.

Then once I went, finally I went and did a session, an Akashic reading session with Lisa Wetzel, who also came on the podcast. And she just said something, yeah, she said something which changed the trajectory for me, where she said through the reading that I'm trying to pull things in, I have to stop reading all the books and stop researching and just open my heart. And that's what changed because then I bring channelers on just for fun.

Susan Gold (32:13.154)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

taniastanly (32:34.341)
but it's not that I depend on the channelers or the people, the spiritual gurus for an advice for my life. So that's a big thing. And it's the same thing with tarot cards. Like you said, all of these new age tools and techniques, it's fun, like games, but ultimately the best answer comes from within. You talk about gentle awakening. Why is gentleness important?

Susan Gold (33:00.152)
Well, I think most of us have been beaten and bludgeoned and are so confused.

all together. And I think there is the possibility that you can just ease your way. Sometimes we do need that billboard to fall onto our head. But, you know, there's been just so many, many methodologies that have been used against us, just to beat ourselves up that it's time to just say, Hey, wow, I've had all this experience.

And it's led me to this point and how can I really go into my loving heart and just maybe look at things from a different perspective for myself, not take immediate action, not change my life immediately, not do all those things you were suggesting. don't really think we do have to do that to awaken. I think we can say, wow, look at me. Look at how many amazing things I've lived through. Look at what I've accepted.

And now look at what's before me. That's why I'm excited about this time. Yeah, it can be overwhelming and intimidating and fearful of what's gonna happen next, but what's gonna happen next? What do I wanna allow from within? I do wanna feel that joy. I do wanna create from a loving heart. I do wanna spread the feeling of joy and friendship.

and forgiveness to others, other human beings walking on their plant, on this planet, doing the best they can. Again, this is not an easy ticket. This is like not, you know, high school, college, even PhD. This is beyond in the soul evolution ride.

taniastanly (34:44.375)
Yeah.

taniastanly (34:50.704)
You

taniastanly (34:56.613)
when you said we've been beaten and bludgeoned and made me laugh because when I wanted to, you know, get it just like awakened, I was also trying to beat myself up over trying to shake out all the trauma in my body, trying to, you know, get to 5D as soon as possible, get to new earth and then get rid of this 3D and then, you know, the whole thing.

Susan Gold (35:21.598)
laughing because I relate. You know, I'm a type A and, you know, being a television producer, you're like bang, bang, bang, you're going to make it happen no matter what. I'm like a steamroller and yeah, no, it's a totally different place. It comes from your heart. It comes authentically. And then all these rules and regulations and beliefs and you've got to meditate, you know, for this amount of time on the cushion every day. All that starts to fall.

taniastanly (35:33.604)
Yeah.

taniastanly (35:44.71)
Yeah.

Susan Gold (35:48.728)
by the wayside and you start to honor your own process, whatever that is for you and ferret your way from that truthful place. And you become much more compassionate to what is going on on the outside, that game you used to play and because you're step away and outside from that. Sometimes you go back in and you play that game and like, Ooh, that doesn't feel so good. think I'm going to step back out again.

taniastanly (36:12.134)
It's true. I wanted to become an ascended master within one year.

Susan Gold (36:21.616)
And you probably were very close, I'm sure.

taniastanly (36:24.997)
Yeah, yeah, that's true. What do you think is the hidden cost in people trying to stay in these toxic systems?

Susan Gold (36:35.822)
Well, you're losing your light. You're losing your authentic spirit and your ability as a creator. And you're tamping your light straight down. I I remember I was at a point where that light was very dim, almost snuffed out. So you're really, you're giving up your gifts as a human being to stay in those toxic.

systems and maybe that's your path. Maybe that's what you need to evolve. Who knows and who's to judge. That's up to you. But I really feel like you can't take advantage of the opportunity that's in front of you if you're numb.

taniastanly (37:18.789)
What do you think is the most common misunderstanding that people have about the so-called gifts that we talk about? Because often, when I also looked into it, people talk about gifts. And I wondered if I had the same gifts too. So, yeah.

Susan Gold (37:35.21)
you totally do. Like I can feel it. Like it comes right through you. You're full of light. You can intuit people's feelings and moods and can also almost intuit where they're going. You're very cognizant and you have that ability as an empath, as a super empath, actually. And you're also a warrior, very strong. And you're here to create a strong message.

I know that about you just sitting here and on this digital space. And so we all have these, these gifts, whatever they, whatever they are. And some are more developed than others, but, they've been mutilated. They've been made not okay. You don't let that out or you're ridiculed by society. God forbid you let that out and everyone's pretending, right? So it's all, it all becomes like a block of concrete here.

taniastanly (38:29.795)
Yeah.

Susan Gold (38:33.122)
You're stuck in this concrete. You can't get out of the construct. And it's not about somebody's better than you are because they have incredible psychic ability or they can read the Akashic records and lead you forward. We all have that ability.

Some are just more developed than others, stronger than others. And it's not about manipulating or controlling the experience. It's about living your day the best you can from the heart and really listening to that intuitive voice. And I know for a lot of us, it's buried under a lot of sticky tape and duck glue and barbed wire turned within, but eventually it becomes more and more clear. And it's happening because the energies are lifting.

This whole veiled system that we've been living under is lifting and the light is coming through.

taniastanly (39:32.021)
When you when we speak about all this right I see all of these changes happening in the women What exactly is happening with the men are they not gonna awaken will I not get to see it in this lifetime?

Susan Gold (39:42.924)
Yeah.

Yeah, the poor men, they've been really, you know, very structured in their role. And I think as the divine feminine, as females, we're more in tune and have been, and that hasn't been as stripped away from us as it has been most men. But there are more men coming online. There are more men talking authentically about their feelings, about their emotions, about their real experience.

in the masculine and they are opening to the feminine. But we're going to be the leaders. The women are leading the way now. It's our turn. Yeah.

taniastanly (40:25.656)
What I noticed personally is that when I started to awaken and I started to get really firm on my beliefs, because initially when I started the podcast show, I didn't understand what was going through, because I kept calling myself a weirdo, because I didn't know the right words to use for the kind of stuff that I'm getting into. But then once I started to bring the guests and we started to have conversations, I realized that the reason why I couldn't express was because I didn't have the right words.

like consciousness, dimensions, et cetera. And once I started to get confident in my beliefs, I have noticed the difference in the men around me too. And it feels like they can understand too the truth. So we as a women, I mean, you could tell me your thoughts about it. I think as a woman, it's because we were asleep that the whole thing went to the place that it is at.

right now and when we awaken back we can bring the rest restore the balance back.

Susan Gold (41:32.342)
totally agree with what you're saying. And I think there's just a natural ability that we have to soothe and to help others feel safe. And I think that the masculine energy is so hungry for that right now. I mean, they've been really boxed in to the point where it's hard to be authentically masculine anymore, right? It's hard.

taniastanly (41:59.905)
Yeah. Yeah.

Susan Gold (42:01.598)
So I agree with you completely. The more that we evolve, the more that consciousness is awakened. I mean, we have this within us. It's not like we have to go outside and perform perfectly. We vibrate at a very high level. That's our natural state. So we don't have to run out and do something to make it happen. It's already here. We just...

taniastanly (42:15.203)
Yeah.

Susan Gold (42:31.052)
have to gently open our hearts and that's a process. That's a big long process, but I think it's happening more rapidly.

taniastanly (42:40.77)
It's true. It's not even about trying to search for something outside. It's just cutting out the noise. Talking about the noise or gently awakening. What tools or practices do you think can help someone start this journey for themselves?

Susan Gold (42:56.942)
Yeah, well, first of all, you have to find out where your heart is because that's a hard place for many of us to find. I mean, my son is, he's 21. It's all about the technology, right? It's all about the connection with the phone. Nature was secondary to the digital space. for, for

that generation, it's about coming back to understand what the heart is and to open from that place. And I'll say what everyone says, nature is the natural connection. We are vibration. We are frequency. We are electric beings. So, you know, I moved to a place where I'm 360 surrounded by nature. The mountains work on me. You don't have a choice. But I also

taniastanly (43:35.372)
Yeah.

Susan Gold (43:47.53)
encourage people to go outside and bare feet and ground their energy. If you don't have grass, look at a tree that's down the street, focus on one bloom that's happening, focus on that bird that just landed on your windowsill for a moment. Find that connection, go back to your breath. Breath work's going to be so essential in the coming years. People are just going to be finding that naturally. We have

Even our breath has been shut down, right? We're in this frequency where we're so on fire, our nervous system is so working on overdrive, we can't, we don't even know we're not fully breathing down into the abdomen and out and that's life. So these are the natural tools. And then there's, you you can write, do the automatic writing and see what comes off your pencil. You can sit in quietude.

taniastanly (44:19.478)
Yeah.

Susan Gold (44:45.816)
You don't have to sit and watch your thoughts perfectly and catch every one and find silence in your head. You're never going to do that probably. That's hierarchy. don't, you know, I had a very rigid meditation practice for long time. I don't do that anymore.

taniastanly (44:53.771)
Hmm.

taniastanly (45:04.129)
Really? So what does your spirituality routine look like now?

Susan Gold (45:08.684)
Well, I awaken and most mornings I have to say I awaken in panic and fear and dread and like something ominous is going to come. This is this is just what it is for me. So I take a breath and I ask at that anything, any energy and emotions that are not mine, I ask them to leave. And then I put my hand on my heart often and I connect through my breath to my heart and sometimes my solar plexus because the fear is so gray.

And then I realized the fear and I know that I can change. So what do I want to allow in this morning? I take it one section of the day at a time. What do I want to allow in this morning? I want to feel peaceful. So then I focus on that peace and I look outside and I notice the nature. And then I go into a little quiet meditation. If I feel pulled to that,

Someday I sit at my counter, I have a little breakfast and I pull cards for fun, you know? Just what nurtures me and what soothes me in that moment. And then I go back out and I go on with my day, but I do try to remember to check in. And maybe that's with a friend, maybe that's with a colleague, or I call someone else to see how they're doing and get out of my own craziness.

So that's really what my spirituality looks like. And then I expand it wider. I send it down into Earth, Mother Sophia, Gaia, whatever you want to call our beautiful planet. And then I send it around the planet. So it goes globally.

taniastanly (46:56.063)
Wow. When you talk about the process or the awakening that you went through, how long did it take for you? I'm curious. And then why did you decide to now come out, write a book, and talk about it?

Susan Gold (47:10.988)
Yeah, so for me, it took decades. Hopefully that won't be the same truth for you. It took decades and it came in chunks. know, initially it was understanding my family lineage. Then it was learning how to work with addiction and free myself from addictions. Then it was a decade of learning to work with clinical depression and understanding how to.

become free of that, noticing the signs of it coming in and getting off the elevator before I hit bottom. I don't use any kind of medication anymore. I did have a period where I was on medication and off medication for about a 10 year period. Then I learned enough about my own sort of inner chemistry and being that I didn't need that medication anymore. That was my experience.

And then I learned how to really honor my own being by going through that horrific, perfect storm of a divorce. And I feel like it's come in layers and I feel like I've never been more awake and I'm awakening now to a greater degree to start questioning every system. And really, what do I believe? And I never gave myself the time. I didn't want to get involved.

taniastanly (48:30.825)
Yeah.

Susan Gold (48:32.91)
But now I do, I feel free and I feel like I have the value and worth. This own being right here is just me, it's not the world, it's not my clients, it's just me. That's what I'm responsible for and really show up in a responsible way rather than give my power away to others to decide for me.

taniastanly (48:54.11)
Yeah, once you get a taste of what it is like to free yourself from these systems, you would want to share this and spread the joy with as many people as possible. You talk about addictions, right? What advice would you give someone who is struggling to get rid of their addiction? How can they start?

Susan Gold (49:12.278)
Yeah, you're not alone. You're definitely not alone. Be as loving and gentle with yourself, even after a binge. You're gonna get clean and sober when you're gonna get clean and sober from whatever the addiction is. It could be exercise, could be cleaning, it could be anything. Doesn't necessarily have to mean you're shooting heroin into your veins or drinking a bottle of wine every night. So just be gentle with yourself.

Find someone you can trust and talk with them. And then there's many modalities for help out there from addictions, but you're on that pathway for a reason. Thank you, addiction, for taking me to a place where I can learn something new and I can evolve. Thank you.

taniastanly (50:02.419)
beautiful. Where there are people right now going through clinical depression themselves and who are struggling to talk about it, struggling to acknowledge it, probably don't have the financial resources to seek help as well, what advice would you give them?

Susan Gold (50:20.364)
Yeah, again, you are not alone. If you can find podcasts or, you know, there's so many modalities to listen to other people that have similar experience to you, because you have to understand you're not alone in this. And that the depression is a lot of anger turned inward and a lot of that anger may not even belong to you.

It may be historical, so understand that. And then again, back to the same thing, treating yourself as gently and compassionately as you possibly can and with love. And whatever you do, if you become suicidal, please do not act out on that because you're taking the wrong person out.

taniastanly (51:09.117)
Yeah.

Susan Gold (51:10.048)
get help and there's much help and if you don't have the money there are resources but really coming to understand and then admitting it acknowledging it and getting the help that's right for you you know a lot of us just sign up with a therapist or start taking medication well the medication you know may bring you up to a place where you can do the actual work but it's not going to take the issue away

You have to do that work to get at these issues that are in compartments, you know, in your body, withholding your energy and restricting you. So you need to go in and dive into that and release that energy. I hope that helps.

taniastanly (51:58.706)
That does. What are some of the resources that helped you get out of depression?

Susan Gold (52:05.174)
When I was going through the final two months of my divorce, I was ready to leave the keys to my house on the counter, take my son with the clothes on our back and leave. I did get suicidal and I knew those red flags that come up when I get suicidal or I get depressed. So I set up a friend for every week, a day and

Saturdays and Sundays. So I had a different friend for each day of the week. And if I felt suicidal and it was their day and I called them because I would call a person a day, I, and they didn't answer, I would say, I'm suicidal. I'm very depressed. I'm going to call the next person on the list until I get someone to speak with. And that saved me through that two month period. So if you can connect,

and set up a support system to check in. That will be a lifeline to hold you through until it shifts and it passes and it changes. You're not gonna stay in this depressed place forever. And notice those moments, those seconds when you have a smile or you have an interaction with someone and it lifts you out of that place even for a moment. Notice that and count that. That counts and that will add up.

and the depression will ultimately lift.

taniastanly (53:33.231)
I really love that. Could you also talk about the same for addiction, the resources that help you get out of addiction?

Susan Gold (53:41.472)
Yeah, so for me, understanding my behavior wasn't really working and nothing really shifted. I tried, I'm only going to have a glass of wine. I'm only going to have one shot of vodka. I'm only going to have one whiskey. And it didn't happen. So again, that compassion, understand you're having an issue. You need help and you need support. So there's many meetings that

Our support that are free even online, you can check those out if that's for you. Great. If it's not, find other modalities that will help you get support from a confidant, someone you trust, a mentor or a professional. And understand you definitely aren't alone. Start listening to many of the podcasts where people tell their stories and you can relate not just to the specific facts, but to their emotions.

and their feelings and how the addictions sort of grab hold of their spirit and start eroding that so you can identify with those emotions and know you're not alone and connect. It's really about connecting with other human beings and understanding that there is opportunity to change.

taniastanly (55:02.448)
Talking about addictions, think I felt like sharing this story of mine. I was going through this binge eating thing earlier this year and last year as well. And I just simply couldn't stop. And what helped me shift was doing Ashtanga yoga. I did Ashtanga yoga. Why are you laughing?

Susan Gold (55:19.874)
Ha

Susan Gold (55:23.478)
Because I did a stronger for like three years until my ankles and my wrists couldn't take it anymore. Loved it.

taniastanly (55:27.292)
Ashtanga yoga was awesome. I did Ashtanga yoga and the addiction, the binge eating thing left my system. It seems like it's a detoxification thing. You move the body, then all of these things that's in your body just leaves the body and then these addictions, you shake the energy in your body, the addictions move away.

because you mentioned about the emotions, try to identify the emotions that are triggering these addictions and that's why I just felt like sharing this story. So you're an Ashtangi too.

Susan Gold (56:03.628)
Yeah, no, I love. Yeah. And yeah. And then I did 20 years of Bikram, which is not spiritual at all. but it, the sweat worked for me. What can I say? But no, I, so I relate to that. And that's what I meant by somatic modalities, things that where you can go into your body, may not even know you're doing it and you can release and change the neural pathways and it shifts your behavior. You know, for some clients I work with that they have really difficulty with

strong depression and acting out in many multiple ways. You know, just clapping can shift your energy, just jumping up and down little jumps, getting out a hula hoop and using the hula hoop will shift your frequency. You know, and like you said, you know, it works, it works. But oftentimes we do need some help. We do need some structure and some help to get

through it if you're really mired into it. But yeah, there's lots of ways and it's going to change so much as we move.

taniastanly (57:07.779)
I love it. Susan, you tell us more about the work that you do and where we can find you?

Susan Gold (57:15.118)
So I'm at Susan Gold.us. There's a great grounding activation opportunity there. If your listeners want to try it out with me, it's just a 30 minute session. I'm offering it for free so you can feel what it's like to really be in your body and in your platform and a place that's calm and soothing and you feel connected. Check that out.

And I do offer sessions. I work with groups and there's a YouTube channel at Susan Gold is magical and YouTube where I have lots of videos talking about the various systems and how to work with what we're facing as they're coming up and unraveling and specific help for how to move through that. have loved this conversation. You're so gifted at what you do and the way that you conduct.

I've appreciated your other episodes and thank you for creating this platform. So we can all learn and we can all heal together. And I think the strongest message I have is that we are in this together.

taniastanly (58:27.469)
I love that. Thank you so much, Susan. It's been a pleasure speaking with you. You also have such a calm energy. I wish all the people that I speak to on the podcast were here in Dubai. Then I could have just hung out, had some coffee, it would have been such a party mode. Thank you so much, Susan. Thank you.